The Chronic (Pain)

Drawn from a broken stencil 
my end view is in the rear view 
endeared through as a stolen rental 
focused mental pushes my physical mettle 
dreams of bio mechanical metal 
fed through my exoskeleton 
tattoos scribed on my skin 
to distract from my melanin 
pain swings like an anchored pendulum 
molecular structures of muscles 
hustles down a beaten path 
my face hides the pain 
underneath an uneven mask 
every day my strength is leaving fast 
reaching for the flask and pain pills 
my souls crushed, the pain kills 
my brain aims faith at the strained ills 
my body is an anvil 
steps are mountains climbing up an anthill 
sleep is a scant thrill, crawling to a stand still 
my fight against the chronic pain 
is done with moxie, every second mocks me 
coupled with cerebral palsy 
the countdown to death haunts me 
moments of relief taunt me 
in a hospital bed on the mend, breaths paltry 
the sun rises again 
feeling saucy after sponge baths 
return to the streets ducking gun claps 
whatever god owes me, he better run that 
in the next life, I want a stunt man 
until then, I’m in a psychotic stance 
hoping to rebuilt as a bionic man